Pain

Annual infractions, intrusions, early summer inflictions,
breaking my body, testing my will, repair a distant dream,
set challenges, abrade my skin and brace for a salt water dousing.

Doubts and despair, ebb and surge whilst calm contentment,
bridled positivity, from nowhere gains an unlikely foothold.
These stange bedfellows do battle for their moment.

Whilst chaos and pain envelop, dictate and impel
an aged body, weakened, addressing mortality, assuming falability,
a time comes for all. There is no fear, just a shrugged resignation.

From nowhere, a gift of words, a smile, a glance,
an unfamiliar touch. A warmth to guide,
casting aside the darkness. The pain absorbed, a broken frame eased.

Rain

At times, when the salt of tears
burns my lips,
and the fear, the hate and self loathing,
entwine, to bring me down.
I pray for rain.

Rain, to envelop,
to hide the streaming
emotions, made physical.
Rain, to hammer home
the pointlessness of life,
and yet,
a deluge,
torrential, consuming,
a flood to engage,
to ignite
that sense of victory,
the glow of self worth
in knowing that
I can hide my despair,
from you,
in the rain.

The Long Walk Home

Tired of trying to take my chances,
late night, drunken, slow song dances,
dim lit, smokey bar room glances.
Still walking home alone.

Had enough of futile dreaming,
persuing you through hopeless scheming,
the rituals, the pointless preening,
and still walking home alone.

Up to here with how it ends,
the constant drive to make ammends,
you tell me 'We can still be friends...'
and I head off home, alone.

Unfinished Sympathy

There's not much to admire
from afar,
your confidence
not withstanding.
The tone of your voice
says it all.
Insistent,
demanding.

You're aware of the sway
you hold
over minds,
unencumbered.
Neither your nor
the sheep in your fold
realise
days are numbered

But with hindsight
I tell you
quite clearly,
it has gone.

Waiting

A sound,
astounds,
whilst emotions
abound.
Tied in, so I wait
for a feeling delayed.

A thought,
uncaught,
amounting
to nought.
Taken out, so I wait
for something I'll hate.

A feeling,
I'm reeling,
these moments
I'm stealing,
mean all, so I wait.
I know it's too late

A word,
unheard,
says it all,
'undeterred'.
So, I'll stay, and I'll wait,
...and I'll wait.

An Imitation of Life

Frost hardens

the flowers of the garden.

Her heart, like mine,

is brittle.

As spring, it rages,

through life's pages.

Her mind, like mine,

so fickle.

Through sun blessed days

of summer's haze.

Her love, like mine,

keeps growing.

An autumn mist,

falls moist, unkissed.

Our lives, entwined,

all knowing.

When back to frost,

all things are lost.

All ends

with new beginnings.